The Bible assumes a healthy care for yourself: "thou shalt love him as thyself" (Leviticus 19:34), and "no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it" (Ephesians 5:29). It also warns that "men shall be lovers of their own selves" (2 Timothy 3:2). The way through is to receive God's love first.
Self-love is everywhere today, from self-care routines to social media mantras, and Christians often wonder whether it is biblical or simply selfish. Scripture gives a balanced answer. It never tells you to hate yourself, and it assumes you will care for your own body and soul. It also warns against a self-centered love that crowds out God and other people. People search these verses when they struggle with self-hatred, when they want a Christian view of self-care, or to answer a friend's question. These twelve King James verses show the healthy self-love Scripture assumes, how being loved by God sets your worth, and the self-love turned inward that it warns against. For your worth in Christ, see self-esteem; for the great commandment, see loving thy neighbor.
Love your neighbour as yourself
1. Leviticus 19:34
"But the stranger that dwelleth with you shall be unto you as one born among you, and thou shalt love him as thyself; for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the LORD your God."
The command to love your neighbour as yourself first appears in Leviticus 19:18; here God applies it to the immigrant and stranger. It assumes you already look after your own needs and asks you to extend the same care outward. Jesus called it the second great commandment (Matthew 22:39).
2. Ephesians 5:29
"For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:"
Paul states a simple fact: people naturally nourish and cherish their own bodies, as Christ does the church. Eating, resting and caring for your health are not selfish; they are normal and good. Even the exhausted prophet Elijah was told by an angel to arise and eat (1 Kings 19:5-7). See health.
3. Proverbs 19:8
"He that getteth wisdom loveth his own soul: he that keepeth understanding shall find good."
Proverbs says the person who gets wisdom loveth his own soul. Seeking what is truly good for you, such as wisdom, understanding and godly habits, is a right kind of self-love; self-destructive choices are the opposite. See wisdom.
4. 1 Timothy 4:16
"Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee."
Paul tells young Timothy, Take heed unto thyself: watch your own life as well as your teaching. Caring for your own soul is not the opposite of serving others; it is how you keep going for their sake.
Loved by God first
5. Psalms 139:17
"How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!"
David marvels that God's thoughts toward him are precious and too many to count. The same psalm says we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Long before you think about yourself, God has been thinking about you. See fearfully and wonderfully made.
6. Deuteronomy 7:7-8
"The LORD did not set his love upon you, nor choose you, because ye were more in number than any people; for ye were the fewest of all people: But because the LORD loved you, and because he would keep the oath which he had sworn unto your fathers, hath the LORD brought you out with a mighty hand, and redeemed you out of the house of bondmen, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt."
God told Israel He did not choose them for their size or strength, but simply because He loved them. His love is the reason for your value, not the reward for it, which frees you from trying to earn your worth by being impressive.
7. Psalms 18:19
"He brought me forth also into a large place; he delivered me, because he delighted in me."
David says God rescued him and brought him into a large place because he delighted in me. Self-hatred says you are a burden; Scripture says "the LORD taketh pleasure in his people" (Psalm 149:4). Let God's verdict speak louder than your inner critic.
8. Psalms 17:8
"Keep me as the apple of the eye, hide me under the shadow of thy wings,"
The apple of the eye is the pupil, the part of the body you protect by instinct. David asks God to guard him like that and to hide him under the shadow of His wings. You are that precious to God, which is a far firmer foundation than any mantra.
Self-love turned inward, and the better way
9. 2 Timothy 3:2
"For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,"
Paul's list of last-days sins begins with lovers of their own selves and ends with people who are lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God (2 Timothy 3:4). The problem is not caring for yourself but making self the center; the rest of the list grows from that root. See humility.
10. John 12:25
"He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal."
Jesus uses a strong Hebrew-style contrast: to love your life or hate it means to prefer Him above everything, not to despise yourself (compare Luke 14:26). He said it while picturing a seed that falls into the ground and dies to bear fruit (John 12:24).
11. Mark 8:35
"For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it."
This is the paradox of the gospel: grasp your life and you lose it; give it for Christ and you save it. Healthy self-love and self-denial meet here, because the self you hand to Jesus is the self He gives back whole. See the cross.
12. Galatians 6:4
"But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another."
Instead of comparing yourself with others, Paul says, prove (test) your own work. Then you can rejoice in what God has done in you, not in being better than someone else. Comparison steals both humility and joy.
A short prayer
Father, thank You that You loved me before I did anything to deserve it, and that Your thoughts toward me are precious. Help me care for the body and soul You gave me without making myself the center of my life. Heal the places where I have spoken to myself with contempt. Teach me to receive Your love, and then to love my neighbour as myself. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Go deeper: a SOAP study prompt
Pick one verse above and write: - Scripture: copy the verse by hand. - Observation: what does it say? Who is speaking, to whom? - Application: what does it mean for you today? - Prayer: turn it into a two-line prayer.
New to this method? See our Bible study guide or pick a Bible reading plan.
Trade harsh self-talk for honest prayer with the 30-Day Prayer Journal · Keep God's words about you close with the Scripture Memory Cards · Print our free Bible verse bookmarks for your mirror or journal
Frequently asked questions
Is self-love biblical?
It depends on what you mean. The Bible assumes a healthy care for yourself: "no man ever yet hated his own flesh" (Ephesians 5:29), and the command to love your neighbour as thyself assumes you look after your own needs (Matthew 22:39). It warns against self-love that puts you at the center, "lovers of their own selves" (2 Timothy 3:2). The biblical pattern is love received from God, then love given to others: "We love him, because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19).
What does the Bible say about hating yourself?
God never asks you to despise yourself. Jesus' words about hating one's life (John 12:25; Luke 14:26) are a Hebrew way of saying love less by comparison, not a call to self-contempt. If you feel worthless, remember that God says "thou wast precious in my sight" (Isaiah 43:4), and Jesus said, "ye are of more value than many sparrows" (Luke 12:7). If self-hatred comes with thoughts of hurting yourself, please reach out for help today (see the note below).
Is self-care selfish for a Christian?
Not when it serves God's purposes. Jesus often withdrew to pray (Luke 5:16) and told His tired disciples, "Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while" (Mark 6:31). God let the worn-out prophet Elijah sleep and eat before giving him anything else to do (1 Kings 19:5-8). Rest, food, exercise, medical care and wise boundaries help you love God and others for longer. Self-care turns selfish only when comfort becomes the goal. See rest.
What is a good Bible verse to remember how God loves me?
Try "How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God!" (Psalm 139:17), "he will rejoice over thee with joy" (Zephaniah 3:17) or "I have loved thee with an everlasting love" (Jeremiah 31:3). Write one on a card for your mirror or journal and read it aloud when your inner critic gets loud. See God's love.
If you struggle with constant self-hatred, or you have thoughts of hurting yourself, please reach out today. In the US, call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or call 911 in an emergency. A pastor or licensed counselor can walk with you; asking for help is wise care, not weak faith.
Sources: All Scripture quotations are from the King James Version (KJV), public domain in the United States. References were checked against the KJV text from bible-api.com.
Related: Bible verses about self-esteem · Bible verses about being fearfully and wonderfully made · Bible verses about loving thy neighbor · Bible verses about God's love · Bible verses about humility · Bible verses about health · Bible verses about rest · Bible verses about the love of Jesus
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